How to Get Over Your Ex

If a person has an experience that is physically, mentally or emotionally traumatic, the mind deals with the situation in one of several different ways. Some people abuse alcohol, food, drugs or other substances to numb the feelings they have inside. Others mourn for a short period of time, restore their faith, balance and sanity, and somehow miraculously move on. But the rest of us left over, usually those who are very analytical and logical, have trouble processing deeply troubling situations. So, we replay the painful situation over and over again in our minds, searching for an answer. But the problem is, the answer cannot be found in the rational mind, because the problem is on an emotional plain. Therefore, the solution has to come from the heart, which needs to be healed and restored. Here is the step by step process I have adapted to end obsessive thinking about an Ex: 

Step 1:
Don't take anything your Ex ever said or did personally, because nothing your Ex ever said or did was about you. Even if your Ex downright blames you for everything that went wrong in your relationship, realize their statement is only coming from who they are, which has absolutely nothing to do with the person you are.
Step 2:
However, not taking your Ex personally is a two sided coin. If during the heat of an argument you react and tell your Ex what an idiot THEY are, and how everything is THEIR fault, then it has nothing to do with them. Your statements only reflect the kind of person you are, which is a person who likes to blame and judge. This has nothing to do with your Ex. Therefore, consciously make an effort to be the person you are, regardless of how your Ex is behaving. Make a list of all the qualities you admire in others, for example: kindness, confidence, compassion, and respect. Chances are you already possess the qualities within yourself. Be very careful not to make statements that don't reflect who you are, even when you may be tempted to give into the hurt and anger you feel.
Step 3
Release your judgments and opinions by becoming friends with Death. As morbid as this sounds, realize that in 100 years, you and your Ex will likely be dead, and nothing you ever fought about will be remembered. If your Ex has the obsessive need to be right and argue with you about everything, give in to their whim and say, "You are absolutely right." Not only will this reinforce your relationship with Death and save you a tremendous amount of personal power, your Ex will find it impossible to argue with you because you are giving the non-verbal message that it really doesn't matter. As one my favorite authors Wayne Dyer once said, "Have you ever noticed how hard it is to argue with someone who isn't obsessed with being right?"
Step 4:
If the hurt and anger is overwhelming, distance yourself from your Ex completely. And no matter what, get on your knees and pray for your Ex every morning. Pray that your Ex will be granted all of the health, wealth and happiness you wish for yourself. Even if you are not a religious person, or you don't believe in God, the act itself is liberating.
In twelve step programs, such as Alcoholics Anonymous, they are taught to pray for people they have a deep resentment towards. At first, you will not mean a word of the prayer. But if you say the prayer consistently for two weeks, you will come to genuinely mean it, and find that there is a part of you that realizes your Ex is just a human being, with their own imperfections, weaknesses and short comings. If you go deeper, you will realize your Ex may also be a very hurt and scared person - even if they outwardly seem very hostile, aggressive and manipulative. Of course, no matter what happened to your Ex in their childhood or even in their day to day life - it does not give them a reason to mistreat you. But by being aware of the fact that your Ex has a certain set of issues to deal with on their own time, it will help you replace the hurt and anger you feel with compassion and understanding.
Step 5:
Own your personal power. Because when you are who you are, regardless of the situation or circumstance that comes your way, then this transforms you into a very powerful person. This is the step that absolutely baffles your Ex, because by you being who you are, and not letting them get you down - it sends your Ex the non-verbal message that you are who you are and they are who they are. But most importantly, it tells your Ex that you are not going to take any of their crap! When you respond to your Ex's hostility with kindness, and your Ex's blame with compassion, it frustrates them to no end, because your Ex cannot get you to play their game.

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Step 6:
Come to understand that you are doing all of this work for no other reason than to realize who you are, restore your sense of balance, and reclaim your personal power. If you do all of this work in order to manipulate your Ex, and make them want you back, your Ex will subconsciously sense your intentions, because at one point or another, you will slip and let your intentions be known without realizing it. When this happens, you will give all of your power back to your Ex, and will have to start all over again with Step 1.
Step 6 is often tricky, because if you master each step up to this point, your Ex may very well want to reconcile. At the very least, your Ex will begin responding to the kindness you send their way in a positive fashion. But regardless if you want to get back together with your Ex, just be friends, or just get over the obsessive thinking - remember your sole purpose is to realize who you are, restore your sense of balance, and reclaim your personal power. If you do all of this work just to manipulate your Ex into responding the way you want them to, it may work for a very short period of time. But I guarantee your Ex will pick up on the fact that your intentions are not genuine, and you will lose your personal power. Not only that, but when you genuinely become who you are, you attract the right kind of people to your life. And maybe your Ex is not the person you are meant to be with! And the only way you will know if you are meant to be with your Ex or anyone else is if you are genuinely who you are.
Step 7:
Forgive your Ex, no matter what they did or didn't do. Unfortunately, it may not be enough at this point to say, "I forgive my ex." And leave it at that. Forgiveness has little to do with words, and more to do with action. Before proceeding with this step, I recommend reading up on the topic of forgiveness, and reading heroic stories about the power of forgiveness. I once read a story about a woman whose daughter was brutally raped and murdered by a man that was eventually caught and sent to prison. As anyone can imagine, the woman spent years of her life in rage and obsession over what this man had done to her daughter. I am sure there are no words to express how much pain this woman was feeling. However, she somehow stumbled on a book entitled, The Course of Miracles and began reading about what the power of forgiveness could do for her. She started to pray for the man, and eventually sent him a letter, letting him know she had forgiven him for the actions he took against her daughter, even though she didn't condone his behavior. To make a long story short, the man wrote the woman back and apologized profusely. The woman felt compelled to see this young man in prison, and she held him as he cried during their first visit. To make a long story short, they became friends, and she became his number one advocate in attempts to release him from prison.
There are not a lot of people walking on the planet as courageous as this woman, but it is an extreme example of what is possible within each one of us. I thought about this woman before I reached out to my Ex with forgiveness in my heart. I sent a gift to my Ex and the woman my Ex left me for, which seemed to pale in comparison to this woman's story. Of course, it took me a little over a year to reach that point, and a lot of soul searching. To this day, I love my Ex with all of my heart on a platonic level. We live in two totally different cities, but still call and send each other emails on occasion as good friends.
I am also in a healthy relationship with someone I am deeply in love with. Next week will be our two year anniversary. I do not think I would be as happy and as deeply in love with this new person as I am now, had I not let go of the anger, bitterness, and resentment I once felt towards my Ex, which is another reason why forgiveness is so important.
A lot of people believe turning off your feelings for a person you once were in a romantic relationship with, or even hating them is a way to show that they are "over" the person. But I believe the exact opposite is true. When you are completely "over" a person, you really wish them nothing but the best - and you are totally detached emotionally from how they act or react. Another point to consider is the fact that love isn't real unless you loved your Ex for the person they are, not the person you wanted them to be. And just because the romantic relationship didn't work out, doesn't mean your Ex isn't a lovable person.

How To Get Rid Of Pimples Overnight ,For That Flawless Skin

 It is true treating pimples needs both patience and persistence, but sometimes time is the thing you are short of. You desperately need them off your face at any cost; the world seems almost cruel otherwise. You almost feel like tearing your hair out thinking of how to get rid of pimples overnight and it is for situations like these that there are over the counter drugs and ointments.

However, just using medicines will not relieve you of the pimples, there are rules you have to follow to make it work out right. There are Dos and Do nots and always remember some things are better left alone, messing with them is not advisable. For example, if you think the easiest way out of your ordeal would be to pop your zits, you are definitely wrong.
Most of the time, overnight pimple cures are just an overblown phrase because an overnight cure for pimples is almost impossible to devise without a change in your lifestyle. Especially if you are used to having a stressful life and you have a biased diet. Try to make it a balanced one including food that would also make it into a cleansing diet. Talking of cleansing, there is no substitute for water, thus make drinking 8-10 glasses of water each day a part of your daily routine.
Tips for overnight cure

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Some home remedies however can rid you of pimples sometimes overnight and even if not overnight by not more than half a day.
You could use the white of an egg to dab on your pimple. Once left on for around 20 minutes it usually helps and dries up the pimple. Another unique method would be to apply toothpaste; preferably not the gel type on the pimple and it has the same effect.
Cleaning the skin is an essential part of curing pimples and the cleaning needs special care when you need to cure pimples overnight. If you wash your face with a soap enriched with aloe vera it can help you immensely. You could also try cleaning your skin with apple cider vinegar, or a more simple remedy would be to clean it with lemon juice.
Before you start any pimple remedy, you must be sure that the acne is not caused due to an allergic reaction to any food or cosmetics. The cure could otherwise have an adverse effect on the acne.
Your skin is unique and different from everyone else's and therefore you should remember that what works for someone else might not work for you and vice versa. Therefore, it would be advisable if you try out the different methods beforehand to know which one suits you.
You could also pay your family physician a visit, who might just as well recommend you to a dermatologist. Both the doctor and the dermatologist might have ideas that would truly rid you of that pimple overnight.

What Is A Secondment And What Are The Benefits?

 

A secondment is where an employee temporarily changes job roles within the same company or transfers to another organisation for an agreed period of time. Secondments can be to organisations within the private or public sector, or to a non profit making organisation, such as a charity or government body, and usually last between 3 to 24 months.Secondments within an external organisation can range from management staff being seconded to an external company to give them experience of managing a different organisation, to technical staff taking secondments with suppliers or customers to gain experience of the supply chain.

Secondments benefit all parties involved; the employee, the employer and the host organisation.

Employees benefit from taking secondments as they are an excellent way to explore different career possibilities without them leaving their current job. They are a valuable way of offering employees professional development and career opportunities, especially within flat organisational structures where promotion may be limited.

Professional placements give employees the opportunity of acquiring new skills whilst continuing their employment with the same organisation. Secondees often acquire valuable experiences whilst on placement and generally gain a broader outlook.

Taking a secondment also demonstrates an employees flexibility and adaptability, both of which are desirable qualities to future employers. Most importantly secondments give employees the opportunity to improve their career possibilities by developing their CVs.

Employers benefit from allowing employees to take secondments in many ways. Employees that have taken a secondment acquire transferable skills and knowledge that they can put into practice once they return to their original position. These skills can then be communicated across the team and other departments within the organisation to improve and enhance the skill set of other staff.

Secondments also give the organisation the opportunity to build a wider network if the secondment is taken in an external company.

Host organisations also benefit where the employee is taking a secondment in an external organisation. The main benefit to them is that they gain assistance with projects, usually from skilled personnel. They also get an external perspective and transferable skills from the secondee, which can be beneficial for the project and the organisation.

If you are an employee interested in taking a secondment outside of your current company, there are many organisations that offer such schemes. Organisations often advertise secondment positions on their company website. The internet is therefore an excellent source to find information about suitable opportunities.

How You Can Cure Bad Breath From Stomach Problems

 

Many people are actually surprised to learn that bad breath doesn't always stem from the mouth itself but is caused by digestive disorders and other such issues. Conditions such as acid reflux disease, an obstructed bowel, diverticulitis, and just plain indigestion can cause chronic halitosis. But how are these conditions connected, and better yet, how can you cure bad breath from stomach problems? 

Most stomach and digestive conditions that cause bad breath do so because of bacteria and harmful enzymes that get absorbed into the system and then released through the breath. In the case of acid reflux disease, those stomach acids can work their way all the back up into the throat and then are expelled in the breath.

In order to cure bad breath from stomach problems you need to understand what condition you have that's causing the problem and then address is appropriately. For instance, if it's acid reflux you need to make adjustments to your diet or get some medication to calm those stomach acids. You can't cure bad breath from stomach problems by just covering it up with gum or mints; once that smell from these products wear off, the bad breath is still present. If you have chronic indigestion you may want to see your doctor to get diagnosed correctly.
Sometimes just understanding the problem doesn't necessarily mean that you can correct it that easily, especially if it's a condition that you're trying to treat and still have not quite fixed. In order to cure bad breath from stomach problems without being able to fix those problems, you need to make sure that you're following a good program of proper oral hygiene. Never neglect brushing and flossing, and of course rinsing afterwards.

You might not be able to cure bad breath from stomach problems by doing this, but you can make sure that it's not any worse. Keep yourself adequately hydrated at all times so that you can neutralize stomach acids and help your mouth keep itself clean. Saliva is a great cleanser for the mouth and when your mouth is dry, your breath is going to be worse.

There is no shame in asking your doctor for help in being able to cure bad breath from stomach problems. He or she may have seen this type of problem brought on by your condition before and may be able to recommend a permanent solution.

Cooking Brisket in the Oven - a Beginners Guide

Cooking brisket in the oven is a time consuming process, but also a very rewarding one. When your family and friends take their first bite of your delicious brisket, they will most definitely be asking you for the recipe. This article will make you a brisket cooking pro!
Did you know that at one time, brisket was considered a very poor quality meat? History has it, that two brothers from Germany, back in the 1950's decided to smoke up some leftover brisket they had. They left the brisket inside their smokehouse for an entire weekend. When they returned to work they sliced up the meat and served it to their customers. The meat was so flavorful and tender that it quickly became a hit.
I remember the first time I had the pleasure of eating beef brisket. It was at this fabulous little Barbecue Restaurant in Croton-On-Hudson, NY called Memphis Maes.
New York isn't known for its BBQ, so my wife and I were a bit skeptical. But after we took our first bite of the "Texas BBQ Beef Brisket", we became believers! My wife then looked at me and said , "You have to make this!" Not wanting to let the lovely wife down, I took it upon myself to try and recreate the BBQ brisket at home. I don't own a smoker, so I needed to improvise and cook the brisket in the oven.
Believe it or not, the oven makes a pretty darn good BBQ brisket. Many BBQ enthusiasts will tell you that a smoker is the only way to cook brisket, but I can tell you from experience this is simply not the case.
The secret to a good beef brisket is to cook it nice and slow at around 225 degrees for several hours. So if you are looking for a quick and easy meal tonight, cooking brisket in the oven is not the way to go.
You will have to prepare this particular recipe one day in advance and you will need to plan some extra time to cook the brisket as it takes several hours to finish cooking.
Lets Talk About Dry Rubs
There are a variety of different dry rub recipes you can use for your beef brisket. One such recipe is listed below. Don't be shy with your dry rub. You want to really coat the brisket well. Its not called a rub for nothing, so really rub those spices into the meat with your hands. After the rub has been applied put the brisket in the fridge and let it marinade over night.
DRY RUB
- 1/4 Cup Paprika
- 1/4 Cup Light Brown Sugar
- 2 Tbs Chili Powder
- 2 Tbs Kosher Salt
- 2 Tbs Freshly Cracked Black Pepper
- 1 1/3 Tbs Granulated Garlic
- 1 1/3 Tbs Granulated Onion
- 2 Tsp Ground Cumin
THE SAUCE
We need some type of liquid to slowly braise the brisket in the oven. Braising is an excellent way to cook brisket in the oven because it keeps the brisket moist and very tender.
What I do is mix some good quality store bought barbecue sauce with a little beef broth to thin it a bit. I like to use a smoke flavored barbecue sauce. To give it a little more smoky flavor, I also add a few drops of liquid smoke. This makes a very tasty braising liquid.
LETS START COOKING ALREADY!
Before we start cooking, lets do a little preparation.
Remove the brisket from the fridge and leave it on the counter for 30 minutes or so to allow it to come to room temperature.
Get yourself a baking dish with a tight fitting lid big enough to hold your brisket.
Mix equal parts of barbecue sauce and beef broth. I like to make enough so that the brisket is at least half submerged. Pour this mixture into your baking dish.
Pre-heat your oven to 225 Degrees.
Heat up a large pan over medium heat and add enough oil to cover the pan. Add the brisket to the pan and brown on all sides until it forms a nice crust.
Place the browned brisket into the baking dish with the braising liquid. Put the lid on and place it in the pre-heated oven.
About half way through the cooking process, flip the brisket over so that the other side has time to cook in the braising liquid.
The brisket is done when it is fork tender and has an internal temperature of around 185-200 degrees F. The amount of time it takes to cook a brisket in the oven really depends on the weight of the brisket. Figure 1 1/2 to 2 hours per pound of meat.
There you have it. My recipe for cooking brisket in the oven.

 

Birthday Gift Ideas For Your Boyfriend

 

Whether you and your boyfriend have been dating for three months or three years, he deserves to have a wonderful present from you whenever he celebrates his birthday. Well-thought out gifts are always a great way to show your affection and love for your boyfriend. Some men may not be as open emotionally as women, but your boyfriend surely could not resist giving you a kiss or a hug in exchange of all the time and effort that you put into finding the perfect birthday present for him.

Here are some great and romantic gift ideas to give the most special man in your life on his birthday:

1. Something romantic.

A birthday present does not always have to be something expensive. Be creative in thinking of a romantic birthday gift for your boyfriend. If he has always given you flowers before, why don't you return the favor by giving him a dozen red roses? It will make him remember you as the only girl who ever gave him roses for his birthday.

A little effort would go a long way, too. Cook him his favorite dish and invite him over for a romantic picnic or dinner. Bake him a birthday cake, invite his friends over and surprise him with a birthday party.

Shower him with love notes, or make his entire day special by giving him a different gift in the morning, noon and at night. Be creative in thinking of something fun, romantic and special to give him a birthday that he is not likely to forget.
 

 2. Something that he wants.

If your special someone is into gadgets, give him that game gadget or music player that he is always talking about. If he is a car enthusiast, get him a great car accessory. Or, rent a sports vehicle or his dream car for him to drive on his birthday. Go out and spend a day indulging in the sport that he just loves.

3. Something naughty.

Glow-in-the-dark boxer shorts are a sure-fire way to tickle his fancy. An intimate yet funny gift will remind him of the intimate moments that you shared together as a couple.

4. Something nice and traditional.

A gift basket with all the things that he likes on one delightful package also makes for a great birthday present for your boyfriend's birthday. A basketful of chocolates or wine is a wonderful birthday present.

If he is an executive, get him an expensive tie, cute cuff links or a nice wristwatch. Give him a set of his favorite cologne, perfume and aftershave. If he loves sailing, get him an antique compass that he can use.

5. Something that says "I love you."

You can literally give him an item with the message of how you feel. Give him a keychain for his car and house keys with an engraved message. Even small items like this would make your boyfriend feel special.

Remember that it is not always the cost that counts when giving out presents for your boyfriend on his birthday.

A well-thought out gift that would remind your boyfriend of how special he is to you will send out the right message on his birthday.

 

How To Make A Girl Fall In Love With You

 Let's get started. Getting a girl of your dreams is much like getting the car of your dream. But unlike a car which you can always bargain for, there is nothing like a 20 percent discount in courting the girl of your dreams, she's so sweet a thing to be discounted, you dearly are in love with her and your feelings for her can only be communicated not by the words of the mouth, but by the words of the heart. Getting the girl actually depends on how big your heart is - faint heart, never won fair lady. 

The first dating idea for any man is to make a good impression. In your doing so, you don't have to talk, dress or do the common things that all the Toms do to get a decent girl's attention. Be unique, that's all you need. Be a man of his own style. Dress decently - indecency can make one be mistaken for arrogance; watch your language - obscene language gives the impression of immaturity, being uncultured and cheap; be a man of good habits - don't drink or smoke like any other loser.

How to make her fall in love with you? Take your time. Add some romance to your dating style. When in College I had a crush on the most beautiful lady in our first year lot. Though all senior guys were out to get that girl, I managed to divert her attention from the other guys. I wrote her three letters without disclosing my identity and slid into her room secretly; all I said was 'Yours Secret Admirer.' The first letter contained the meaning of her name, this I got by playing around with the initials of her name to make meaning. The second was a funny message that could only be read backwards and it was all about her physique and her smartness. In the third letter I told the girl to be ready to receive a rose flower from her admirer, but only if she could be kind enough to phone him using a number that I had included in the letter. The girl did phone me that very night, and her first words to me were, "Hallo Secret Admirer." So, the story of our love affair came to be. Later she told me that was so creative of me, no one had approached her in that manner. I made her fall in love with me and made a date in the romantic manner.

Befriending and understanding the girl you are out to get is the next important thing. This is what I also did. You have to understand that as a lady, she loves to be loved, adores to be adored and needs to be needed. This will move you closer to the girl and you'll get to know what she's into, what she likes and dislikes, and what her style is. Love is built upon friendship and it always leaves individuals better off having known each other should they break up. I and my College steady were to break some time later but to date, we are the best of buddies. Be sure that bringing out the selflessness friend in you will make her create room for you in her heart.

A shoulder to lean on and some good friend that she can always turn to is all that a lady wants. Please don't hesitate to be helpful and supportive. Be that friend who rekindles her zeal of hardworking and restoring hope back into her life when she looses hope. This above all other things will make you her daily vitamin simply because you bring out the best in her in terms of personality and character. In you, she'll have found that friend whom she can open up to, share with and advice each other on the rights and wrongs, the dos and don'ts of life. Don't forget to always be there to celebrate the good times, and to lend an ear when the girl needs you to listen as a friend.

Make the girl feel special; because she's someone's friend - your friend, and let her know that she too has touched your life in a unique way like no one else could. Compliment her for her company and for being there when you needed her, when you felt sad and all alone. Show appreciations for the comfort the girl offers you and for making you smile.

In your day to day talks, share your dreams, your world, and every aspect of your life with your girl. Always dream with her, build with her, and always cheer her on and encourage her. Tell your girl how you always think about her even when you try not to think about her. Let the girl know that she's your first thing in the morning and the last thing when you go to bed at night.

Her knowing that you were thinking of her when you slipped beneath the softness of your blanket and gave in to the bliss of sweet dreams, will make her go 'my my' and her heart will sing your name all the year round.

You have to be creative and constructive to keep girl's interest in you so full of life. I remember one time I told my girlfriend to be to imagine we are both deaf and dump. We then sat opposite each other on the table and started sharing our feelings for each other using eyes and hand signs. It turned out to be some fun. There was also this time that we were in the library and we decided we are not going to speak to each other verbal, so I wrote a love note on a paper and passed it across the table to her, she replied and on and on we carried on our love on paper conversation till we almost exhausted a whole rim of paper. At sometime, I noticed that some guys sited with us on the table were enjoying our ordeal than their studies. Such are the things that made the girl embrace my world. I remember her suggesting that we play deaf and dump two years after we broke up, can you imagine that?

Never fail to phone her, even when she least expects it. I once called some girl that I was interested in at four o'clock in the morning. When inquiring of what I was doing up so early, I told her I was in thirteenth heaven, where people think of their loved ones when they can't sleep. Wow! First thing early the next morning, she was at my door with a king-sized hug for me. No matter how many dates you take her, don't make any elbow - exceeding moves after any date, just drop her home and with a friendly handshake, wish her good night. Don't kiss her when she expects you to. Your respect as a gentleman will be earned on how patient you are with her when it comes to such matters as kissing her and accessing her inner graces.

The writing is on the wall that you want her, but you can't have her just yet. Increase your demand. Try to show her that men are also hard to get at times. Make her realize that when she feels a little dizzy, a little tired, a little sad, a little sick, a lot bored and very much cold, she's actually missing vitamin you. By this time, she'll be so much into you and since love is truthful and is characterized by open and honest communication, honestly promise her your everlasting devotion, loyalty, respect, and your unconditional love for a lifetime. Prove to her that you'll always be there for her, to listen and to hold her hand, and that you'll always do your best to make her happy, and feel loved.

Remember, patience is the key to her heart; be like that gardener watching a fruit as it hangs on the tree, day after day admiring it, but, exercising tremendous self-discipline, neither feeling the fruit, nor pinching it, nor testing it to see if it is ready. And then, one day he holds out his hand and the fruit simply drops into it, ripe, warm and eager to be eaten.

The patience and self-control which you practice will make you more attractive and charming. This will qualify you as her daily vitamin and win you that heart hers.

I wish you to meet the girl of your dreams ASAP, make her fall in love with you, and make her feel the happiest girl in the world!